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veritty• both therapy and japanese (two regular things I have weekly) have been so good this week, despite yesterday being a horrid mess of anxiety. COOL.
• i'm reading Heaven Official's Blessing/Tian Guan Ci Fu and it's everything I expected. it's comforting despite all the horror, and I think it will continue to be comforting for me even when soul-destroying angst arrives, especially since by then it will feel even more familiar. it's just... my type of story, I think, and I have had that feeling for a long time before I even started to read it. (guess my intuition in those things still works, nice.) Xie Lian is a very very comforting (and comfortable) narrator, and I think it will be the story I'm especially weak for – aka good intentions leading into terrible, no-good things. and characters who mean good but FUCK EVERYTHING UP AGAIN AND AGAIN.
(...oh god, is this why I love Xiao Xing Chen's story so much? fuck, I'm so obvious hhhh goddammit.)
• that said, I'm hyperaware of how much MDZS has become kind of a home to me already. god. I just love the world to pieces, I wanna roll around it and wonder at its existence. every time I get a little bit away from it, be it bc of TGCF or something else, and then come back, i feel SUCH WARMTH. ITS HOME. I KNOW IT SO INTIMATELY ALREADY. i love it when the world of the text feels like this... it's the best feeling, the one I seek out with many canons AND fics... ahhhh
• I wonder if it will take an audiodrama (when it inevitably gets produced) to get me into SV... although I'm getting closer to giving it a try.
• i'm reading Heaven Official's Blessing/Tian Guan Ci Fu and it's everything I expected. it's comforting despite all the horror, and I think it will continue to be comforting for me even when soul-destroying angst arrives, especially since by then it will feel even more familiar. it's just... my type of story, I think, and I have had that feeling for a long time before I even started to read it. (guess my intuition in those things still works, nice.) Xie Lian is a very very comforting (and comfortable) narrator, and I think it will be the story I'm especially weak for – aka good intentions leading into terrible, no-good things. and characters who mean good but FUCK EVERYTHING UP AGAIN AND AGAIN.
(...oh god, is this why I love Xiao Xing Chen's story so much? fuck, I'm so obvious hhhh goddammit.)
• that said, I'm hyperaware of how much MDZS has become kind of a home to me already. god. I just love the world to pieces, I wanna roll around it and wonder at its existence. every time I get a little bit away from it, be it bc of TGCF or something else, and then come back, i feel SUCH WARMTH. ITS HOME. I KNOW IT SO INTIMATELY ALREADY. i love it when the world of the text feels like this... it's the best feeling, the one I seek out with many canons AND fics... ahhhh
• I wonder if it will take an audiodrama (when it inevitably gets produced) to get me into SV... although I'm getting closer to giving it a try.
